yard marble...marred yarble

"All I can think of is 'ahh. ah ah. ahh...'
each specimen of heavy hollywood
wind down, little one"

Sometimes, the things I do must be an attempt at getting my inside on the outside.  I think that's what the picture above is.  

I have some things to say about how the most satisfying things in life are finding out about yourself and you are never quite as fulfilled and close to love as when you go inside yourself.  Because this is, I believe, how we find God and His voice; I gleaned this from a flash of inspiration one morning, and I kind of want to write a poem about it, but I haven't yet.  It was this, simply- "God, when did you join the silence?"  There are so many, so many voices out there.  There are truths and there are lies, and there are sincere exhortations and there are outright manipulations, but those don't matter unless you know what's inside of you.   I was walking down the street last week in the middle of the night, and the fog was forcing down on everything around me.  I could barely see anything except for the hazy glow from the streetlights.  In that atmosphere, nothing was clear, and nothing was discernible.  That is how I feel most of the time in this life.  The moments when everything is clear, just like a morning after a really clean rainstorm and the sun is shining and you can see everything for miles and miles around, those moments usually come when I go inside my self, quietly.  God has joined the silence.  He is not in the confused fog of the night, he is not in the advice and ideas and truths and lies and conversations of all the people around us.  He is in the silence.  And in the silence, he talks peace; he talks gentleness and healing to the soul.

That being said, everything else is important- the fog and the conversations and crazy life.  They fill your silence with more meaning and more life.  They give you reasons to keep going back to sort things out in the silence.

Now, because I think I am being funny by saying the next words, for my own selfish pleasure (are you laughing?) , I would like to interpret what came out of me with the drawing and poem that is above these words.

I changed my mind, about 40 hours later.

Just remember that the flower is being blasted by the sun while being soaked in water from a hose...a hose...  And ahh.  ah ah.  ahh is aesthetically pleasing.  Let it work in your buh-rain.

Please watch Stella.  Listen to JJ.  Speak nice words.  Eat to your needs.  Face your heart.  Dance your face off.  Or just dance your face.  Face the dance?  Let there be a tumultuous noise.  Fight everything.

-Someday things bigger than me will swallow the ocean.